Read about Paul Kalanithi again; his story of realization of his life, through the negotiations with his death. Not read his book ‘When Breath Becomes air‘…But that title says a lot.
I picked Paul and his book during our usual chat with my wife and showed the above article from a malayalam news daily1. During our conversation, I was browsing her mobile and stuck at a like mail to her new blog ‘live like a tourist’. It forced me to have a look at it. To my shock , the topic was on the similar soul!
She did not notice that I was reading her mobile. After glancing through her blog, I told her that just now I read a similar topic (as Paul’s story)!.
She became curious….I showed her blog! She smiled..a smile with an unknown feeling!
We continued sharing our thoughts….
Me: “…..it’s altogether a different perspective when such a counting needed in our life. It will be hard to stimulate. Because the reality is *not* faced alone, your surroundings join you to face the reality, and a conducive scenario gets created. If I am in a situation where, I have just an year left, then, the whole of my surrounding will change its view to me! Probably, if I don’t work, even if I can, no problem. I am free to do anything…almost anything which I like…”
(When I just said as an example about my days are counted, saw her face and voice changing)
Me(continued): “However, in the current situation, where there is no counting, if I leave my job for my dream of writing a book…or dream of just being a saint in Himalayas…?”
(The question was answered by both of us through our eyes!)
It was raining outside, a welcome rain with thunder, for this severe summer!
We sat outside our french window, with a cup of hot tea; Wow, amazingly cool!
She: “I remember reading about a mom who was given the count for her life as an year. She had 4 kids. She decided to dedicate her remaining life to make her kids self sufficient. So she started imparting essential skills which she thought essential.”
Me:”Yes, each person’s situation is different and their thought process can depend on it. Like in case of Paul and Lucy, they decided to have kid also he decided to pursue his dream of writing a book! By the way, what did this mom teach her kids?” (I was anxious)
She:”Skills which are needed to live, like how to operate the bank accounts, shop their essential stuffs, communication……”
She: “I tried to simulate this mom situation in me. So thinking that, I should teach our kids also such things….yes planned…but simulation is simulation!”
Me:”Yes, and..Reality is…..!”
The rain, thunder and cool breeze…the tea was over!
: Original title of this verse was ‘Counting Days
‘, later changed to the current one, and confused with “Deadline Pressure”;
Just ordered Paul’s book!
1: Mathrubhumi News Daily